• What Is Sepecial About Vietnamese Wedding Customs

Vietnamese weddings are more than ceremonies; they are a profound expression of Vietnam's culture, highlighting values like filial piety and deep respect for ancestors. These customs beautifully blend ancient spiritual meaning with modern celebrations, demonstrating the unbroken continuity of tradition. Experience the true heart of Vietnam's heritage through its wedding rituals. Learn more about Vietnamese culture with Vietpower Travel.

The Role of Weddings in Vietnamese Culture

In Vietnam, marriage represents more than the union of two people; it unites two families and often two extended networks. Traditionally, parents arrange or approve the marriage, considering social background, family reputation, and astrological compatibility.

A Vietnamese wedding also involves respect for ancestors. Before the ceremony, families offer incense and food at the ancestral altar, inviting deceased relatives to witness and bless the event. Red and gold, colors of happiness and wealth, dominate the decorations and clothing.

What is special about Vietnamese Wedding

Spiritual beliefs guide many decisions surrounding the wedding. Couples often consult a geomancer or fortune teller to choose an auspicious date based on the lunar calendar and their zodiac compatibility. If their birth years are considered incompatible, the families may perform symbolic rituals to “balance” the union, such as offering fruit or incense to the Kitchen God, believed to protect family harmony.

Regional Differences in Customs

  • Northern Vietnam: Ceremonies are more formal, emphasizing rituals and family introductions.
  • Central Vietnam: Weddings are smaller and deeply influenced by local spiritual beliefs.
  • Southern Vietnam: Celebrations are more festive, with large receptions and generous hospitality.

These differences illustrate Vietnam’s cultural diversity while maintaining shared values of family and respect.

Traditional Wedding Customs and Ceremonies

Vietnamese wedding ceremonies combine symbolic gestures and family unity. Each stage - from the first meeting to the tea ceremony - reflects layers of respect, spirituality, and tradition. Understanding these steps helps reveal how Vietnamese families preserve their heritage while embracing modern life.

The Proposal and Engagement

The first step is the proposal ceremony (called Le Dam Ngo), during which the groom’s family visits the bride’s home to formally ask permission for the marriage. The meeting is intimate and involves the exchange of symbolic gifts such as tea and betel leaves, representing sincerity and good intentions.

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Next comes the engagement ceremony (Le An Hoi). It is more elaborate and public, symbolizing the couple’s official commitment. The groom’s family presents gift trays (known as mam qua), filled with items such as:

Traditional Gift

Meaning

Betel leaves and areca nuts

A traditional symbol of marriage and loyalty

Tea and rice wine

Respect and gratitude

Sticky rice and cakes

Fertility and prosperity

Fruits and sweets

Sweetness in married life

Jewelry

The groom’s family’s goodwill and blessing

These trays are usually arranged in odd numbers (five, seven, or nine) because odd numbers signify luck and growth in Vietnamese belief. During the ceremony, both families offer incense to their ancestors, acknowledging that the marriage unites not only the living but also the spirits of past generations.

Why Vietnamese Give Odd Numbers For Gift Trays On Engagement Ceremony?

Odd numbers represent vitality and fortune in Vietnamese thought. They are believed to bring ongoing prosperity and happiness for the couple.

Discover more posts on the same topic and dive deeper into Vietnam’s traditions, beliefs, and artistry. Explore our Vietnam culture category to find inspiration for your next cultural journey.

The Wedding Day

The wedding day, or main ceremony is the most important event in Vietnamese  wedding customs. The groom’s family travels to the bride’s home in a formal procession carrying the gift trays. Once received, the bride’s family offers a small party for relatives and friends. Then the groom's family take the bride home, this marks the union of the two households.

At the groom’s house, both families perform the tea ceremony. The couple serves tea to their parents and elders as a gesture of gratitude. In return, they receive blessings, jewelry, or red envelopes containing money. The ceremony often includes offerings at the ancestral altar, accompanied by prayers for fertility, harmony, and longevity.

The event concludes with a banquet, where guests share dishes symbolizing happiness and prosperity.

What is the difference between the proposal and engagement ceremonies?

The proposal is an informal introduction and agreement between families. The engagement is a formal promise of marriage, witnessed by relatives and community members.

The Post-Wedding Visit

A few days after the wedding, the couple makes a post-wedding visit (Le Lai Mat) to the bride’s parents’ home. This visit expresses gratitude and strengthens ties between families. The newlyweds bring small gifts, such as fruit or tea, symbolizing continued respect and affection.

This ritual, though simple, remains one of the most cherished traditions because it reinforces the lifelong connection between two families.

Invitations and Attire: Symbols of Harmony and Status

Every invitation and outfit in a Vietnamese wedding tells a story of respect, wealth, and heritage. From the red-and-gold invitation cards to the elegant Ao Dai, these cultural symbols unite modern aesthetics with centuries-old traditions that value harmony and prosperity.

Wedding Invitations

Wedding invitations in Vietnam serve both a practical and ceremonial purpose. Traditionally, they are printed on red paper with gold lettering, featuring dragon and phoenix motifs symbolize harmony between husband and wife. The invitation lists not only the couple’s names but also those of both parents, reflecting the importance of family.

In modern urban areas, invitations may adopt minimalist Western designs or be printed in both Vietnamese and English, but the tone of respect remains unchanged.

What is the meaning of red and gold in Vietnamese weddings?

Red symbolizes happiness and luck, while gold signifies prosperity. Together, they express hope for a joyful, wealthy marriage.

Traditional Attire for wedding

The bride’s traditional outfit is the Ao Dai, a long silk tunic worn over flowing pants, typically in red or gold. The color choice is not random, red attracts good fortune and gold represents prestige. The bride may wear a Khan Dong, a circular headdress made of silk and brocade.

The groom’s attire, called Ao Gam, is often blue or dark red, embroidered with dragons or bamboo motifs, symbolizing power and resilience.

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Today, many couples incorporate both traditional and modern clothing. They might wear the Ao Dai for the ceremony and change into a Western-style gown or suit for the banquet.

How have wedding outfits changed over time?

While the Ao Dai remains the national symbol of beauty and grace, couples today personalize their attire to reflect individuality, blending tradition with contemporary fashion.

The Wedding Feast and Symbolic Food

Food is a central element of any Vietnamese wedding. The dishes are not only chosen for taste but also for meaning. Each dish served at the banquet expresses blessings for the couple’s new life.

What are the typical dishes on Vietnamese wedding and their meanings?

Dish

Symbolism

Red sticky rice

Happiness and longevity

Boiled chicken

Purity and prosperity

Husband-and-wife cake

Loyalty and harmony

Roast pig

Wealth and celebration

Lotus seeds sweet soup

Fertility and peace

In northern Vietnam, wedding menus are usually formal and elaborate, while southern feasts tend to be lively and abundant. Music, speeches, and laughter fill the atmosphere, turning the meal into a communal expression of joy.

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What foods are traditional at Vietnamese weddings?

Sticky rice, spring rolls, and sweet soups are common, each symbolizing good fortune and long-lasting happiness.

Wedding Gifts and Etiquette

Gift-giving plays a crucial role in maintaining respect and harmony. During the ceremonies, families exchange symbolic items such as tea, fruit, and cakes. Guests typically give red envelopes containing money as their wedding gift.

Traditional etiquette advises avoiding gifts associated with bad luck, like clocks (which suggest time running out) or sharp objects (which symbolize division). The amount of money is often chosen with lucky digits such as 6 or 8.

Jewelry, especially gold, is another important gift. It is often presented by parents or in-laws as a symbol of their blessing and to provide financial support for the couple’s new life together.

What should guests give at a Vietnamese wedding?

The most appropriate gift is a red envelope with money, offered with both hands and accompanied by warm wishes for happiness and success.

Spiritual Beliefs and Wedding Superstitions of Vietnamese

Spiritual beliefs surrounding Vietnamese weddings reveal the depth of the country’s cultural heritage. Many rituals aim to ensure harmony, fertility, and protection from misfortune.

  • Astrological Compatibility: The couple’s birth years, based on the twelve-animal zodiac, are compared to assess compatibility. If a conflict appears (for example, the tiger and monkey years), rituals are performed to neutralize it.
  • Auspicious Dates: Families consult fortune tellers to select the best wedding date. Days considered “black” or “forbidden” are avoided.
  • Symbolic Offerings: Before the ceremony, offerings of fruit, sticky rice, and flowers are made to ancestors and household spirits, inviting blessings for the marriage.
  • Folk Beliefs:
    • Rain on the wedding day is seen as a sign of prosperity.
    • Breaking a glass during the banquet may symbolize the start of a new chapter.
    • The bride should not return to her parents’ house too soon after the wedding or she may “carry away” the family’s good fortune.

These beliefs may vary from region to region but all reflect a shared desire for harmony and good fortune in married life.

Why is choosing a wedding date so important?

Vietnamese families believe the date affects the couple’s future happiness. Choosing an auspicious day aligns human life with natural and spiritual forces.

Vietnamese Wedding in Modern Life

Urbanization and globalization have reshaped Vietnamese weddings. Many couples now hold shorter ceremonies and celebrate in restaurants or hotels rather than at home. Western influences, such as white gowns, photo sessions, and personalized vows, have merged with traditional rituals.

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Despite these changes, most families remaining elements: ancestor worship, tea ceremonies, and the exchange of red envelopes. These enduring customs show how tradition continues to adapt while preserving its spiritual roots.

How are modern Vietnamese weddings different from traditional ones?

They are often less formal, shorter, and include Western features, yet ancestral and spiritual rituals remain central to the celebration.

A Living Expression of Vietnamese Culture

Vietnamese wedding customs beautifully connect love, family, and deep spiritual respect. Every ritual, from the betel leaves to the ancestral tea, affirms the core Vietnamese values of harmony and honoring the past. As styles modernize, this graceful blend of tradition and new beginnings endures, celebrating cultural continuity. Discover the beauty of Vietnam's traditions with Vietpower Travel.

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